1
00:00:10,541 --> 00:00:12,416
The audience--
2
00:00:12,416 --> 00:00:14,166
they want to see that even
3
00:00:14,166 --> 00:00:15,750
a good man as yourself can be
4
00:00:15,750 --> 00:00:18,250
- driven too far.
- Yeah, I understand that,
but that's not really my thing.
5
00:00:25,083 --> 00:00:26,458
Why can't you move?
6
00:00:26,458 --> 00:00:28,083
Someone stole my fusion core.
7
00:00:28,083 --> 00:00:29,750
What are you suggesting?
8
00:00:29,750 --> 00:00:33,250
We travel together, get the head
and take it to the Brotherhood.
9
00:00:33,250 --> 00:00:36,916
In exchange, you'll lend me the services
of your knights to save my father.
10
00:00:37,500 --> 00:00:40,250
You know, I've never
done an advertisement before
11
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:41,333
in my life.
12
00:00:46,750 --> 00:00:48,625
I wonder if anyone survived.
13
00:00:48,625 --> 00:00:50,333
I did.
14
00:00:51,416 --> 00:00:52,375
Lucy!
15
00:00:58,166 --> 00:00:59,791
Where are we?
16
00:00:59,791 --> 00:01:01,791
We're in the best place in the world.
17
00:01:04,625 --> 00:01:06,750
We're in a vault.
18
00:01:28,583 --> 00:01:30,041
Oh.
19
00:01:30,041 --> 00:01:31,833
Hello there.
20
00:01:31,833 --> 00:01:34,041
Yep, it's me, Cooper Howard,
21
00:01:34,041 --> 00:01:36,791
star of stage and screen.
22
00:01:36,791 --> 00:01:39,875
But I'm not here today
to talk to you about my latest picture.
23
00:01:39,875 --> 00:01:45,333
No, today I'm here to show you
a vast and wonderful place,
24
00:01:45,333 --> 00:01:49,458
not made by God Almighty
but the working man.
25
00:01:49,458 --> 00:01:52,583
A veritable Camelot of the nuclear age.
26
00:01:52,583 --> 00:01:55,041
Now, how 'bout we turn on some lights.
27
00:01:57,416 --> 00:01:59,541
There, that's better.
28
00:02:03,041 --> 00:02:05,916
Now, I'm speaking to you from
deep inside the fully-livable
29
00:02:05,916 --> 00:02:09,625
Model 96JQ1164.
30
00:02:09,625 --> 00:02:11,875
And what a beaut she is.
31
00:02:12,875 --> 00:02:14,875
And what a song she sings.
32
00:02:14,875 --> 00:02:18,708
Now, that right there
is Vault 4's three-foot-thick lead casing.
33
00:02:18,708 --> 00:02:21,125
Strong enough to keep out the rads
34
00:02:21,125 --> 00:02:23,166
and the Reds.
35
00:02:26,375 --> 00:02:28,208
Each one of these underground burghs
36
00:02:28,208 --> 00:02:30,916
comes with all the modern amenities
you've come to expect
37
00:02:30,916 --> 00:02:33,333
from our rip-roarin' republic.
38
00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:35,750
Now, this corridor here
is Sycamore Street,
39
00:02:35,750 --> 00:02:39,208
where you'll wave howdy
to any one of your 200 neighbors
40
00:02:39,208 --> 00:02:42,791
on your way home for an enchanted evening
with your loved ones.
41
00:02:42,791 --> 00:02:43,916
Mm.
42
00:02:43,916 --> 00:02:45,750
Meet the Hawthornes.
43
00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:49,125
Now, this isn't just your average
all-American family.
44
00:02:49,125 --> 00:02:51,833
No, Lloyd and Cassandra here
are both scientists,
45
00:02:51,833 --> 00:02:55,125
specializing in the effects of radiation
on human DNA.
46
00:02:55,125 --> 00:02:56,458
That's right.
47
00:02:56,458 --> 00:02:59,583
And we'll be living
and working right here in Vault 4,
48
00:02:59,583 --> 00:03:02,958
leading a community
governed entirely by scientists.
49
00:03:02,958 --> 00:03:04,958
Wait a second,
did you say "living down here"?
50
00:03:04,958 --> 00:03:07,666
Well, there hasn't been
a nuclear incident, has there?
51
00:03:07,666 --> 00:03:08,875
Uh, no, not yet.
52
00:03:08,875 --> 00:03:13,250
But, uh, our family
and a group of 80 volunteers
53
00:03:13,250 --> 00:03:16,083
will be conducting
a five-year trial of Vault 4.
54
00:03:16,083 --> 00:03:18,375
To demonstrate to the world that,
55
00:03:18,375 --> 00:03:21,041
no matter what comes our way,
56
00:03:21,041 --> 00:03:23,125
America will be ready.
57
00:03:23,125 --> 00:03:24,791
Five years.
58
00:03:24,791 --> 00:03:27,875
Well, I may play a hero
in the movies, but...
59
00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:29,875
you all are heroes in real life.
60
00:03:29,875 --> 00:03:32,375
{\an8}And now you can be a hero, too.
61
00:03:32,375 --> 00:03:35,666
{\an8}By purchasing a residence
in a Vault-Tec vault today.
62
00:03:35,666 --> 00:03:37,666
{\an8}Because if the worst
should happen tomorrow,
63
00:03:37,666 --> 00:03:40,333
{\an8}the world is gonna need
Americans just like you
64
00:03:40,333 --> 00:03:42,708
{\an8}to build a better day after.
65
00:03:42,708 --> 00:03:44,583
And cut.
66
00:03:44,583 --> 00:03:47,166
That was a great take. You happy?
67
00:03:47,166 --> 00:03:48,458
Fellas, are you happy?
68
00:03:49,875 --> 00:03:51,458
All right. Gary, I'm wrapped, right?
69
00:03:51,458 --> 00:03:53,541
- Yes, sir.
- Uh, how'd we do?
70
00:03:53,541 --> 00:03:55,416
- We were so nervous.
- Aw, you did great.
71
00:03:55,416 --> 00:03:57,375
Yeah, it was really lovely to meet you.
Thanks for coming out.
72
00:03:57,375 --> 00:04:00,375
Thank you so much. Good to meet you.
73
00:04:00,375 --> 00:04:02,125
- Mr. Howard, great work today.
- Ah.
74
00:04:02,125 --> 00:04:03,416
Oh, thanks. Thanks, man.
75
00:04:03,416 --> 00:04:06,458
Bud Askins. I oversee
our Southern California operations.
76
00:04:06,458 --> 00:04:08,125
- Ah.
- I, uh, came over to Vault-Tec
77
00:04:08,125 --> 00:04:11,000
in Q3 after a ten-year stint at West Tek.
78
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,375
- West Tek.
79
00:04:12,375 --> 00:04:13,958
It's a defense contractor.
80
00:04:13,958 --> 00:04:16,333
Oh, I'm, uh, very familiar with you guys.
81
00:04:16,333 --> 00:04:18,125
You designed the T-45 power armor.
82
00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:19,333
First of its kind.
83
00:04:19,333 --> 00:04:21,458
No, I-I oversaw the-the rollout.
84
00:04:21,458 --> 00:04:24,375
You know, the design flaws
were ridiculous, but...
85
00:04:24,375 --> 00:04:26,416
- they sure looked great.
- I wore the T-45
86
00:04:26,416 --> 00:04:29,791
when we almost lost the great state
of Alaska to the Reds.
87
00:04:29,791 --> 00:04:33,250
Those design flaws of yours cost
a lot of good men and women their lives.
88
00:04:33,250 --> 00:04:35,583
Yeah. Product management was never my bag.
89
00:04:35,583 --> 00:04:38,375
I'm more focused on HR R&D now.
90
00:04:38,375 --> 00:04:41,750
Overseeing workflow optimization
of management timelines.
91
00:04:41,750 --> 00:04:43,041
I'm all about scale.
92
00:04:43,041 --> 00:04:46,166
Most people think scale means
increasing global market share.
93
00:04:46,166 --> 00:04:48,375
That's thinking in three dimensions,
and I'm talking about four.
94
00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:52,375
Because what is the ultimate weapon
to destroy your competition?
95
00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:54,750
It's not outselling them.
It's not outsmarting them.
96
00:04:55,833 --> 00:04:57,083
It's time.
97
00:04:57,083 --> 00:04:58,833
- Hmm.
- Time...
98
00:04:58,833 --> 00:05:00,916
- is the ultimate weapon.
- Uh-huh.
99
00:05:00,916 --> 00:05:03,041
- Yeah.
Sounds complicated,
100
00:05:03,041 --> 00:05:06,125
but the future of all humanity
comes down to one word.
101
00:05:06,125 --> 00:05:07,416
Yeah, what's that?
102
00:05:07,416 --> 00:05:09,583
Management.
103
00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,791
- Well, I'm awful happy for you, Buck.
104
00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:16,458
Bud. Bud Askins.
105
00:05:18,041 --> 00:05:19,916
- Hey.
- Ooh!
106
00:05:19,916 --> 00:05:21,541
Mmm.
107
00:05:21,541 --> 00:05:22,666
I'm at work.
108
00:05:22,666 --> 00:05:24,083
- Oh, how 'bout we clock out?
109
00:05:24,083 --> 00:05:25,625
- Oh.
- Huh? Nothing against
these colleagues of yours,
110
00:05:25,625 --> 00:05:29,666
but what do you say you and me knock back
a couple of piña coladas by the pool,
111
00:05:29,666 --> 00:05:31,125
- listen to the hi-fi.
- Mm.
112
00:05:31,125 --> 00:05:33,250
There is a wrap party.
113
00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:35,291
What, a... a wrap party?
114
00:05:35,291 --> 00:05:36,958
- For this?
- Yes.
115
00:05:38,458 --> 00:05:40,916
All right. We go for a couple of hours,
116
00:05:40,916 --> 00:05:42,000
we shake a few hands--
117
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,666
It's at our house.
118
00:05:45,250 --> 00:05:47,500
The things
I'm willing to do for you
119
00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:49,791
never cease to amaze me.
120
00:05:49,791 --> 00:05:51,000
Mm.
121
00:06:10,583 --> 00:06:13,583
Roosevelt, I'm sorry.
You can't come, buddy.
122
00:06:13,583 --> 00:06:16,000
I'm heading into enemy territory.
123
00:06:19,875 --> 00:06:21,375
You be a good dog.
124
00:06:21,375 --> 00:06:22,958
Go to bed.
125
00:06:37,083 --> 00:06:39,291
Yeah, A Man and His Dog--
that movie's great.
126
00:06:39,291 --> 00:06:42,416
Mm. Yeah. I love that one, too.
127
00:06:42,416 --> 00:06:44,541
It was my real dog.
128
00:06:44,541 --> 00:06:46,166
Beautiful home, Mr. Howard.
129
00:06:46,166 --> 00:06:47,375
Thank you.
130
00:06:47,375 --> 00:06:49,083
Did Cooper Howard just walk by?
131
00:06:49,083 --> 00:06:51,000
He was so good in that movie.
132
00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:59,083
[chuckles] Oh, it's him!
133
00:07:04,791 --> 00:07:06,791
Mr. Howard. Hello.
134
00:07:07,958 --> 00:07:11,875
Negotiations in Anchorage are having
a serious impact on presales.
135
00:07:11,875 --> 00:07:13,791
We'll have to circle up with D.C.
about that.
136
00:07:13,791 --> 00:07:16,708
Ideally before our quarterly
projection release.
137
00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:20,750
Mr. Howard. Mr. Howard.
138
00:07:22,291 --> 00:07:23,583
Bud Askins.
139
00:07:24,583 --> 00:07:25,708
Right.
140
00:07:26,708 --> 00:07:29,458
Would you mind, you know,
doing the butler voice?
141
00:07:29,458 --> 00:07:31,083
- From the show?
- All right.
142
00:07:31,083 --> 00:07:33,458
I only do it for close friends
and beautiful women,
143
00:07:33,458 --> 00:07:35,250
but you two are already halfway there.
144
00:07:35,250 --> 00:07:37,000
- Stop it.
145
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:40,875
"I, Bartholomew Codsworth,
am ever ready to serve."
146
00:07:42,291 --> 00:07:43,625
- Hoo-hoo!
- Perhaps
147
00:07:43,625 --> 00:07:46,750
when you finish your shift,
we could head up and party in the hot tub.
148
00:07:46,750 --> 00:07:47,833
What do you think of that?
149
00:07:47,833 --> 00:07:49,875
- Oh, no, no. No, thank you.
- No?
150
00:07:49,875 --> 00:07:51,291
Okay.
151
00:07:52,500 --> 00:07:53,500
All right.
152
00:07:53,500 --> 00:07:55,875
Excuse me. Your wine.
153
00:07:55,875 --> 00:07:57,375
Well, shit, Seabass.
154
00:07:57,375 --> 00:07:59,791
You might be the only one of my invites
who actually showed up.
155
00:08:02,375 --> 00:08:03,833
- Yeah.
156
00:08:03,833 --> 00:08:05,958
- Not our usual scene, I'll give you that.
- No, it is not.
157
00:08:05,958 --> 00:08:08,291
I think our Hollywood actor friends
don't want to be seen
158
00:08:08,291 --> 00:08:11,000
celebrating with the pitchman
for the end of the world.
159
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:13,375
Oh, you don't know the half of it.
160
00:08:13,375 --> 00:08:15,291
You hear I lost a movie over these ads?
161
00:08:15,291 --> 00:08:17,250
Yeah, showed up to set,
162
00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:19,375
the actors wouldn't
come out of their trailers.
163
00:08:19,375 --> 00:08:21,750
Bonnie Lewis said it was on moral grounds.
164
00:08:21,750 --> 00:08:23,125
Bonnie Lewis?
165
00:08:23,125 --> 00:08:25,375
She's done more ads
than a fucking billboard.
166
00:08:25,375 --> 00:08:27,375
- Yeah.
- Fucking Hollywood Reds.
167
00:08:27,375 --> 00:08:29,958
I'm telling you, radicalism
is sweeping through Hollywood
168
00:08:29,958 --> 00:08:32,291
like a bad case of the clap.
169
00:08:32,416 --> 00:08:34,500
Even got your friend, Charlie Whiteknife.
170
00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:36,000
Are you kidding me? Charlie?
171
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,041
- Mm.
- I served
172
00:08:37,041 --> 00:08:38,416
- with that guy.
- They have meetings
173
00:08:38,416 --> 00:08:39,500
and everything.
174
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:40,875
It's a shit show.
175
00:08:40,875 --> 00:08:42,166
But you, my friend,
176
00:08:42,166 --> 00:08:44,083
you know which way the wind is blowing.
177
00:08:44,083 --> 00:08:45,208
And it's that--
178
00:08:45,208 --> 00:08:48,333
a world run by people who wear
pocket protectors to a pool party.
179
00:08:48,333 --> 00:08:49,833
...about delivery platforms.
180
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:51,875
Yeah, you might be right about that.
181
00:08:51,875 --> 00:08:55,083
I mean, I've dipped my bits
in the same gravy train.
182
00:08:55,083 --> 00:08:56,833
Sold my vocal rights to that
183
00:08:56,833 --> 00:09:00,541
spinning robot they sell
to housewives and perverts.
184
00:09:00,541 --> 00:09:02,250
Guess how much they paid me for that.
185
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:03,708
Ten million?
186
00:09:08,416 --> 00:09:10,333
No, I got 186, pre-tax.
187
00:09:10,333 --> 00:09:11,625
Maybe you could've asked for more.
188
00:09:11,625 --> 00:09:12,750
Well, I did ask for more.
189
00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:13,833
And what did they say?
190
00:09:13,833 --> 00:09:15,916
My agent got them
to throw in one of those robots.
191
00:09:15,916 --> 00:09:17,458
- The fuck
192
00:09:17,458 --> 00:09:20,041
were they thinking?
Every time I walk into my own house,
193
00:09:20,041 --> 00:09:22,708
my own voice saying,
"Hello, sir, do you want to sit down?"
194
00:09:26,125 --> 00:09:27,333
It's fucking awful!
195
00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,750
I thought the studio owned that character.
196
00:09:28,750 --> 00:09:31,250
They did.
And then RobCo bought the studio.
197
00:09:31,250 --> 00:09:32,833
- Mm.
- Listen to me,
198
00:09:32,833 --> 00:09:34,833
Hollywood is the past. Forget Hollywood.
199
00:09:34,833 --> 00:09:37,666
The future, my friend, is products.
200
00:09:37,666 --> 00:09:39,416
You're a product. I'm a product.
201
00:09:39,416 --> 00:09:42,125
The end of the world is a product.
202
00:09:42,125 --> 00:09:43,375
Oh.
203
00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:47,125
And for those of us
who can successfully embrace that,
204
00:09:47,125 --> 00:09:48,666
I'd say the future is golden.
205
00:09:48,666 --> 00:09:50,458
To the future.
206
00:09:51,458 --> 00:09:52,875
To the future.
207
00:09:58,250 --> 00:10:00,583
I, Bar-Bartholomew Codsworth,
208
00:10:00,583 --> 00:10:02,500
am ever ready to serve.
209
00:10:10,333 --> 00:10:12,625
Why, hello there, boys.
210
00:10:12,625 --> 00:10:15,833
Now, y'all here for the ice cream social,
211
00:10:15,833 --> 00:10:17,625
I'm afraid I got some bad news for you.
212
00:10:18,875 --> 00:10:21,541
Let's get to-to it, shall we-shall we?
213
00:10:21,541 --> 00:10:22,708
Wai-Wai-Waiting.
214
00:10:22,708 --> 00:10:24,083
Take its fusion core.
215
00:10:24,083 --> 00:10:25,750
There's no fudge here,
216
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:29,291
o-only a General Atomics Inter--
217
00:10:29,291 --> 00:10:33,000
Destroying a legitimate business?
218
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:36,000
That's illegal round these parts.
219
00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,375
Says who?
220
00:10:38,583 --> 00:10:40,083
The government.
221
00:11:08,875 --> 00:11:11,750
Using teeth for ammunition.
222
00:11:11,750 --> 00:11:15,333
Always finding new ways
to kill each other up there, aren't they?
223
00:11:15,333 --> 00:11:17,625
We'll need, uh, an antibiotic.
224
00:11:17,625 --> 00:11:19,625
I know you mentioned
you're eager to keep moving,
225
00:11:19,625 --> 00:11:22,291
but your friend is gonna have to
recover here for a couple of days
226
00:11:22,291 --> 00:11:23,500
before it's safe to travel.
227
00:11:23,500 --> 00:11:26,208
I'm fine. I'm fine.
228
00:11:26,208 --> 00:11:29,208
You had a rotten human tooth
lodged in your shoulder.
229
00:11:29,208 --> 00:11:30,500
You're not fine.
230
00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:33,000
Titus, this is a vault doctor.
231
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,625
We should listen to his advice.
232
00:11:35,625 --> 00:11:38,833
We can't thank you enough
for letting us in and taking care of us.
233
00:11:38,833 --> 00:11:40,250
It's what we do here.
234
00:11:40,250 --> 00:11:42,375
Oh, and we found his armor.
235
00:11:42,375 --> 00:11:44,750
Our surface foragers
are bringing it back now.
236
00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:46,583
Oh, that's great. Thank you.
237
00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:48,458
It's not ideal for us to stay put,
238
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:51,916
but, I got to admit,
it sure feels good to be back in a vault.
239
00:11:51,916 --> 00:11:54,916
I don't know
if you've been to the surface, but...
240
00:11:54,916 --> 00:11:56,791
it is...
241
00:11:56,791 --> 00:11:57,875
not good.
242
00:11:57,875 --> 00:11:59,833
I was born on the surface.
243
00:12:01,041 --> 00:12:02,208
Oh.
244
00:12:02,208 --> 00:12:03,458
Uh, sorry.
245
00:12:03,458 --> 00:12:04,958
I-I didn't know. You seem so--
246
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,166
Normal?
247
00:12:07,250 --> 00:12:08,916
- My mother was a courier.
248
00:12:08,916 --> 00:12:11,791
I was 11 and traveled with her to Filly.
249
00:12:12,958 --> 00:12:16,791
Three days' walk from home and we
could still feel the heat from the blast.
250
00:12:17,875 --> 00:12:19,041
You're from Shady Sands.
251
00:12:19,041 --> 00:12:20,250
Many of us are.
252
00:12:20,250 --> 00:12:23,375
We were lucky to find such
a hospitable community here in Vault 4.
253
00:12:23,375 --> 00:12:26,583
Yeah. So were we.
254
00:12:26,583 --> 00:12:28,750
We just need you to stay
in quarantine a few hours longer
255
00:12:28,750 --> 00:12:31,291
to make sure
you don't track in any contamination.
256
00:12:33,083 --> 00:12:34,833
Thank you so much.
257
00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:56,708
You smell good.
258
00:12:58,041 --> 00:13:00,041
What?
259
00:13:03,750 --> 00:13:05,250
Oh.
260
00:13:08,375 --> 00:13:10,000
You want to have sex?
261
00:13:12,708 --> 00:13:14,625
You mean use my cock?
262
00:13:15,708 --> 00:13:17,166
Yeah.
263
00:13:19,625 --> 00:13:23,625
I don't know.
Uh, that weird thing could happen.
264
00:13:23,625 --> 00:13:25,750
What weird thing?
265
00:13:25,750 --> 00:13:28,083
Well, it's just, for some guys-- not me--
266
00:13:28,083 --> 00:13:31,833
uh, but for some guys, you know,
when they make it move,
267
00:13:31,833 --> 00:13:35,583
it gets all big and hard
like a big pimple and then it pops.
268
00:13:35,583 --> 00:13:39,500
And they say it can happen
to anybody, but it's still, it's...
269
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:41,541
it's gross.
270
00:13:41,541 --> 00:13:44,208
You know, that's... uh,
that's actually completely normal.
271
00:13:44,208 --> 00:13:46,333
It happens all the time.
272
00:13:46,333 --> 00:13:48,666
Every time, ideally.
273
00:13:56,500 --> 00:13:58,041
I'm a knight.
274
00:13:58,041 --> 00:14:01,208
Um, a knight of the Brotherhood.
275
00:14:02,875 --> 00:14:04,625
We're-we're not supposed to.
276
00:14:06,791 --> 00:14:07,958
Okey dokey.
277
00:14:31,041 --> 00:14:32,125
Mind if I sit down?
278
00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:43,166
Mmm.
279
00:14:43,166 --> 00:14:45,333
We shouldn't be wasting time down here.
280
00:14:45,333 --> 00:14:47,666
You heard the doctor.
281
00:14:47,666 --> 00:14:50,625
Besides, we made a deal
to find that head together,
282
00:14:50,625 --> 00:14:52,708
and you're no good to me dead.
283
00:14:53,875 --> 00:14:57,291
- Also, I would feel bad.
- I think these people
are trying to trap us here.
284
00:14:57,291 --> 00:14:58,791
No, they're not.
285
00:14:58,791 --> 00:15:02,000
And some of these people
are from the surface, like you.
286
00:15:04,750 --> 00:15:07,708
- Ah.
- Hi.
287
00:15:07,708 --> 00:15:11,083
This is a cult. Same as any.
288
00:15:11,083 --> 00:15:12,166
It's not a cult.
289
00:15:12,166 --> 00:15:15,916
- Everyone's smiling.
- Titus, this is a safe place,
290
00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:18,583
where people take care of each other.
291
00:15:19,666 --> 00:15:20,916
But why?
292
00:15:20,916 --> 00:15:22,416
Well, because in the vaults,
293
00:15:22,416 --> 00:15:25,000
we recognize that
we all need each other,
294
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:27,333
just like I needed you on the surface.
295
00:15:30,083 --> 00:15:32,541
Now, we're stuck here
until you're able to travel.
296
00:15:32,541 --> 00:15:35,583
So, give this place a shot?
297
00:15:38,416 --> 00:15:41,208
Sorry to interrupt your breakfast,
but our overseer
298
00:15:41,208 --> 00:15:43,666
wanted to say a quick hello.
299
00:15:44,750 --> 00:15:46,958
Overseer Benjamin, this is Lucy and Titus.
300
00:15:46,958 --> 00:15:50,291
Hey, guys. Just wanted to say hi.
301
00:15:50,291 --> 00:15:54,375
- Hello.
- And obviously, welcome to Vault 4.
302
00:15:54,375 --> 00:15:56,791
Just some housekeeping,
a few things to be aware of.
303
00:15:56,791 --> 00:15:59,250
Stay out of Level 12, obviously.
304
00:15:59,250 --> 00:16:01,416
We'd prefer you not go there.
305
00:16:01,416 --> 00:16:05,250
Oh, and we only have one foosball table,
so if you want to play,
306
00:16:05,250 --> 00:16:06,916
you got to sign up.
307
00:16:06,916 --> 00:16:10,250
If there's no pencil on the sign-up sheet,
please let me know.
308
00:16:10,250 --> 00:16:13,416
I do have pencils.
309
00:16:13,416 --> 00:16:17,708
Uh, oh, and if you're unfamiliar
with how the bathrooms work, just ask.
310
00:16:17,708 --> 00:16:21,666
Asking is less embarrassing
than getting it wrong. Trust me.
311
00:16:21,666 --> 00:16:25,125
We've had incident after incident
with newcomers.
312
00:16:25,125 --> 00:16:28,041
- Okay, that should cover it.
313
00:16:28,041 --> 00:16:32,208
Any questions or concerns beyond foosball
or pencils or bathrooms,
314
00:16:32,208 --> 00:16:33,833
Birdie's available.
315
00:16:33,833 --> 00:16:36,625
And once again, welcome to Vault 4.
316
00:16:36,625 --> 00:16:38,500
We're glad to have you.
317
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:41,250
- Thank you.
Mm.
318
00:16:55,166 --> 00:16:56,916
Mm.
319
00:17:07,625 --> 00:17:10,291
That was weird, right?
320
00:17:10,291 --> 00:17:13,000
- The overseer?
- That's what I'm saying.
321
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,250
- When people are nice--
- No.
322
00:17:14,250 --> 00:17:17,375
Titus, I'm... I'm talking about his eye.
323
00:17:17,375 --> 00:17:18,958
Lots of people have one eye.
324
00:17:18,958 --> 00:17:22,000
Well, yeah, but...
325
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,041
I mean, his was in the middle.
326
00:17:24,041 --> 00:17:25,250
A little to the left.
327
00:17:25,250 --> 00:17:27,416
And the Level 12 stuff? I mean...
328
00:17:30,666 --> 00:17:32,458
Oh.
329
00:17:34,833 --> 00:17:36,625
Sorry.
330
00:17:36,625 --> 00:17:38,583
Have a nice day.
331
00:17:48,291 --> 00:17:52,750
♪ Lonely hours ♪
332
00:17:52,750 --> 00:17:57,166
♪ Away from you...
333
00:17:58,416 --> 00:18:01,083
Doesn't get any better than this.
334
00:18:01,083 --> 00:18:04,125
Nope. It does not.
335
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:05,291
Mmm.
336
00:18:07,958 --> 00:18:11,958
You ever... think about working
somewhere else?
337
00:18:13,416 --> 00:18:15,416
I used to.
338
00:18:15,416 --> 00:18:20,791
But with you doing these ads, it's...
it's practically the family business.
339
00:18:20,791 --> 00:18:22,500
Maybe we get Janey a job in payroll
340
00:18:22,500 --> 00:18:24,166
- when she's 15.
Sit.
341
00:18:24,166 --> 00:18:26,250
- Oh, that's a good puppy.
342
00:18:26,250 --> 00:18:29,458
I think about it. Quitting showbiz.
343
00:18:31,291 --> 00:18:34,875
Buying us a ranch up in Bakersfield.
344
00:18:35,875 --> 00:18:38,375
Get back to being a real cowboy again.
345
00:18:38,375 --> 00:18:40,208
And what would I do?
346
00:18:40,208 --> 00:18:42,791
You would look pretty.
347
00:18:42,791 --> 00:18:45,333
And help me raise chickens.
348
00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:48,333
No.
349
00:18:48,333 --> 00:18:50,375
You would look very good
in a pair of overalls.
350
00:18:50,375 --> 00:18:52,208
What's gotten into you?
351
00:18:52,208 --> 00:18:53,875
A gin martini.
352
00:18:55,625 --> 00:18:57,541
I don't know.
353
00:18:57,541 --> 00:19:01,583
Maybe I've been reading
too much news lately.
354
00:19:01,583 --> 00:19:05,500
Got me second-guessing
the whole city life.
355
00:19:13,791 --> 00:19:15,000
Oh, come on.
356
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,666
Y-You've seen these around.
357
00:19:16,666 --> 00:19:18,083
Not on you, I haven't.
358
00:19:18,083 --> 00:19:20,875
Bud Askins-- he licensed them from RobCo.
359
00:19:20,875 --> 00:19:23,458
We're integrating them
with the Vault-Tec admission systems.
360
00:19:23,458 --> 00:19:26,791
- Bud Askins.
- Bud Askins. Trust me, I know.
361
00:19:26,791 --> 00:19:29,041
The company's filled with guys like him.
362
00:19:29,041 --> 00:19:32,500
But Vault-Tec exists with or without me.
363
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,416
Doesn't do anyone any good
to complain from the sidelines.
364
00:19:35,416 --> 00:19:37,958
All I'm saying is we have this one life.
365
00:19:37,958 --> 00:19:42,250
Do you really want to spend your
nine-to-fives working with these assholes?
366
00:19:42,250 --> 00:19:44,250
I need this job, Coop.
367
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:46,875
- It guarantees us a spot in the vaults.
- We got money.
368
00:19:46,875 --> 00:19:48,375
We can buy a spot in the vaults.
369
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:50,250
One of the good vaults.
370
00:19:51,791 --> 00:19:53,833
What's that supposed to mean?
371
00:20:01,125 --> 00:20:04,333
I'm doing what I can, okay?
372
00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:07,458
Just... trust me.
373
00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,166
Please.
374
00:20:12,875 --> 00:20:14,541
Yeah.
375
00:20:22,166 --> 00:20:23,666
As all nations race
376
00:20:23,666 --> 00:20:26,250
to secure uranium
and control the future of energy,
377
00:20:26,250 --> 00:20:29,083
a shortage has emerged,
turning even allies
378
00:20:29,083 --> 00:20:31,375
into potential competitors.
379
00:20:31,375 --> 00:20:33,708
Will energy prices surge this winter
380
00:20:33,708 --> 00:20:36,041
- and will it lead to an expanded war?
381
00:20:36,041 --> 00:20:38,083
Details after a word
from our newest sponsor...
382
00:20:38,083 --> 00:20:41,208
Sorry you couldn't make it
to the party the other night, Charlie.
383
00:20:42,250 --> 00:20:44,625
Guess you had one of your meetings, huh?
384
00:20:44,625 --> 00:20:47,250
One of your Communist meetings?
Come on, man.
385
00:20:47,250 --> 00:20:50,625
We watched people die together up north
fighting against all that horseshit.
386
00:20:50,625 --> 00:20:52,041
Yeah, and for what?
387
00:20:52,041 --> 00:20:55,666
What do you mean, for what?
For the American dream.
388
00:20:55,666 --> 00:20:58,875
We're actors.
We make movies, Charlie.
389
00:20:58,875 --> 00:21:01,000
Yeah, the American dream has me
getting shot in the ass by you all day.
390
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:04,000
You got five acres in Tarzana.
I think you're doing all right.
391
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,750
It don't matter, Coop.
392
00:21:05,750 --> 00:21:10,083
- Vault-Tec's the fucking devil, man.
- My wife works there.
393
00:21:10,083 --> 00:21:13,500
- You really think Barb's the devil?
- No, no, okay, I...
394
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,375
I like Barb, okay?
395
00:21:17,666 --> 00:21:19,625
Do you know what
"fiduciary responsibility" means?
396
00:21:19,625 --> 00:21:21,083
- Fiduciary responsibility?
- Yeah.
397
00:21:21,083 --> 00:21:23,833
No, I have no fucking idea.
398
00:21:23,833 --> 00:21:25,708
I play a cowboy for a living.
399
00:21:25,708 --> 00:21:28,541
Okay.
So, the U.S. government has outsourced
400
00:21:28,541 --> 00:21:30,791
the survival of the human race
to Vault-Tec.
401
00:21:30,791 --> 00:21:33,583
- Vault-Tec is a private corporation
402
00:21:33,583 --> 00:21:36,250
that has a fiduciary responsibility
to make money for its investors.
403
00:21:36,250 --> 00:21:38,791
And how does it make money?
404
00:21:39,958 --> 00:21:42,291
- By selling vaults.
- That's called capitalism, Charlie.
405
00:21:42,291 --> 00:21:45,333
But they can't sell vaults
if these peace negotiations go through.
406
00:21:45,333 --> 00:21:48,958
So Vault-Tec
has a fiduciary responsibility
407
00:21:48,958 --> 00:21:51,208
to make sure that it don't work out.
408
00:21:51,208 --> 00:21:54,166
Yeah. How they gonna do that?
409
00:21:54,166 --> 00:21:55,916
I don't know.
410
00:21:58,333 --> 00:22:00,500
You remember that movie
we did with Johnny Morton--
411
00:22:00,500 --> 00:22:03,041
you were the sheriff
and I was some generic Indian?
412
00:22:03,041 --> 00:22:05,916
Come on, man, don't say that.
Tallhand Mudlake could talk to horses.
413
00:22:05,916 --> 00:22:08,000
You played him with grace
and with dignity.
414
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,875
It was a great role for you.
415
00:22:09,875 --> 00:22:11,541
Morton played a rancher
who owned half of Missouri.
416
00:22:11,541 --> 00:22:14,291
And what happens when the cattle ranchers
have more power than the sheriff?
417
00:22:14,291 --> 00:22:17,625
- The whole town burns down.
- The whole town burns down. Right.
418
00:22:17,625 --> 00:22:20,125
Vault-Tec is a trillion dollar company
that owns half of everything.
419
00:22:20,125 --> 00:22:23,291
And after ten years of war,
the U.S. government is broker than a joke.
420
00:22:23,291 --> 00:22:25,708
The cattle ranchers are in charge, Coop.
421
00:22:25,708 --> 00:22:27,458
Oh, come on.
422
00:22:27,458 --> 00:22:29,791
Unless the people do something about it.
423
00:22:29,791 --> 00:22:31,958
I guess everything's a conspiracy, right?
424
00:22:31,958 --> 00:22:34,208
- Come on, man,
you sound like you're in a cult.
- And you're sitting here
425
00:22:34,208 --> 00:22:36,458
defending a system that's ready
to set the world on fire, Cooper.
426
00:22:36,458 --> 00:22:39,041
Maybe you're the one in the cult.
427
00:22:43,166 --> 00:22:45,000
Look.
428
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:47,000
You should come to a meeting.
429
00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:49,583
You should learn the truth
about where your wife works.
430
00:22:52,791 --> 00:22:54,458
For her sake.
431
00:23:06,750 --> 00:23:08,583
Bartender, can I get one more?
432
00:23:17,916 --> 00:23:22,041
- Hello?
Hello! May I speak to Barb, please?
433
00:23:22,041 --> 00:23:23,791
- Who is it?
- It's Henry.
434
00:23:23,791 --> 00:23:26,208
Henry from the Vault-Tec
assistant training program.
435
00:23:26,208 --> 00:23:27,958
Is this Mr. Cooper Howard?
436
00:23:27,958 --> 00:23:31,500
Uh, I'm sorry, Henry, but my wife prefers
not to take work calls in the evenings.
437
00:23:31,500 --> 00:23:32,833
Oh, no, no, no, uh,
it'll just be a few minutes.
438
00:23:32,833 --> 00:23:34,416
- Okay. All right, bye-bye.
- I have some questions for her. I don't--
439
00:23:34,416 --> 00:23:38,375
Uh, that was Henry. From work.
440
00:23:38,375 --> 00:23:40,833
Do you have a... a new assistant?
441
00:23:40,833 --> 00:23:42,000
Yeah, I do.
442
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,708
Yeah? Is Janey asleep?
443
00:23:44,708 --> 00:23:47,250
Uh, she's reading
Little House on the Prairie to Roosevelt.
444
00:23:47,250 --> 00:23:49,708
Ah. Does he like it?
445
00:23:54,291 --> 00:23:55,375
What?
446
00:23:56,458 --> 00:23:58,708
It's going to be hard on her, that's all.
447
00:24:00,291 --> 00:24:01,791
What is?
448
00:24:01,791 --> 00:24:04,291
You know, no dogs in the vaults.
449
00:24:12,208 --> 00:24:14,458
Says who?
450
00:24:14,458 --> 00:24:16,125
Hmm?
451
00:24:18,041 --> 00:24:20,791
No dogs in the vaults. Says who?
452
00:24:21,875 --> 00:24:24,375
Well... that's just
453
00:24:24,375 --> 00:24:26,833
the, um... that's the policy.
454
00:24:27,916 --> 00:24:29,291
You know, dogs eat meat.
455
00:24:30,375 --> 00:24:31,958
It's an avoidable inefficiency.
456
00:24:31,958 --> 00:24:33,958
Ah.
457
00:24:33,958 --> 00:24:35,458
Yeah.
458
00:24:39,375 --> 00:24:41,666
That's not really the question, is it?
459
00:24:41,666 --> 00:24:44,583
All I'm asking is
460
00:24:44,583 --> 00:24:47,083
who decided that
there were no dogs in the vault?
461
00:24:47,083 --> 00:24:50,791
Well, I think that
is a relatively trivial concern,
462
00:24:50,791 --> 00:24:53,291
given the prerequisite conditions
of us living in
463
00:24:53,291 --> 00:24:54,750
a nuclear fallout shelter.
464
00:24:54,750 --> 00:24:58,375
Well, you know, I'm not sure that it is,
to be quite honest.
465
00:24:58,375 --> 00:24:59,875
What?
466
00:24:59,875 --> 00:25:01,416
I'm serious.
467
00:25:01,416 --> 00:25:04,125
Who-who ma-- who makes the rules?
468
00:25:04,125 --> 00:25:06,625
Because no dogs allowed--
that is a new rule.
469
00:25:06,625 --> 00:25:10,541
Somebody decided that
and didn't share it with fucking anyone.
470
00:25:12,375 --> 00:25:13,708
I mean, what else
do you have in store for us?
471
00:25:13,708 --> 00:25:15,875
Are the-are the blue jumpsuits--
472
00:25:15,875 --> 00:25:17,875
are those mandatory? What if
I don’t want to wear a blue jumpsuit?
473
00:25:17,875 --> 00:25:19,666
- What if I want to wear a green one?
- So the bomb falls,
474
00:25:19,666 --> 00:25:21,166
and you want to know about your wardrobe?
475
00:25:21,166 --> 00:25:23,166
No, I want to know about my freedom.
476
00:25:23,166 --> 00:25:25,708
I didn't go to war defending that freedom
477
00:25:25,708 --> 00:25:27,583
so that I could live in a cellar
under the boot heel
478
00:25:27,583 --> 00:25:29,208
of Chairman Bud Askins.
479
00:25:29,208 --> 00:25:33,250
And while you were away at war,
I stayed home.
480
00:25:33,250 --> 00:25:35,500
- I know you--
- I was checking the mail
481
00:25:35,500 --> 00:25:36,916
- every day.
- I know.
482
00:25:36,916 --> 00:25:38,791
I was waiting by the phone every night.
483
00:25:38,791 --> 00:25:41,833
And every night I was driving myself crazy
484
00:25:41,833 --> 00:25:43,000
imagining the worst.
485
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:47,000
So, you do not need to tell me
how bad war is, Coop.
486
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:49,500
Every day I go into work and I think about
487
00:25:49,500 --> 00:25:52,875
how humanity can survive a nuclear event
488
00:25:52,875 --> 00:25:56,166
that will wipe out 90% of life on earth
and I come home
489
00:25:56,166 --> 00:25:59,625
and you're talking to me about
hiding out at a ranch up in Bakersfield.
490
00:26:00,666 --> 00:26:03,708
You know, I don’t even know
what planet you're on sometimes, Coop.
491
00:26:03,708 --> 00:26:07,250
But when the bombs drop,
a two-hour drive ain't gonna cut it.
492
00:26:07,250 --> 00:26:10,666
So yes, there will be no dogs
in the vaults.
493
00:26:10,666 --> 00:26:13,125
And no, none of it is ideal.
494
00:26:13,125 --> 00:26:16,916
But if billions of people
are going to lose their lives,
495
00:26:16,916 --> 00:26:19,083
I will do whatever it takes
to make sure the people I love--
496
00:26:19,083 --> 00:26:21,291
that is you and that is Janey--
497
00:26:21,291 --> 00:26:23,000
aren't among them.
498
00:26:25,208 --> 00:26:27,875
I have worked hard
499
00:26:27,875 --> 00:26:30,583
to make sure we go into
500
00:26:30,583 --> 00:26:32,583
a special vault for management,
501
00:26:32,583 --> 00:26:36,166
where we will oversee
all of the other vaults.
502
00:26:38,208 --> 00:26:42,125
You don't get it.
That is the best we can possibly hope for.
503
00:26:43,166 --> 00:26:45,083
For Janey.
504
00:26:52,541 --> 00:26:54,000
Hey, hey.
505
00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,250
- Hey, hey, hey.
506
00:26:56,250 --> 00:26:58,250
Come here.
507
00:27:00,833 --> 00:27:02,375
I'm sorry.
508
00:27:02,375 --> 00:27:05,791
I know you always
try to do the right thing.
509
00:27:07,583 --> 00:27:09,458
That's what I love about you.
510
00:27:24,375 --> 00:27:28,750
And when you turn the little handle
up top, it all goes away.
511
00:27:28,750 --> 00:27:30,666
Yep, that's...
512
00:27:30,666 --> 00:27:33,000
- how a toilet works.
- Mm-hmm.
513
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:34,916
I'm-I'm actually from a vault.
514
00:27:34,916 --> 00:27:36,291
You're what?
515
00:27:36,291 --> 00:27:39,666
- I'm from a vault.
- So you are.
516
00:27:39,666 --> 00:27:43,666
- Goosey MacLean.
- Oh, no, no. It's-it's Lucy.
517
00:27:47,958 --> 00:27:51,625
Nope, it says Goosey. Hmm.
518
00:27:51,625 --> 00:27:53,666
But hey, that's something.
519
00:27:53,666 --> 00:27:56,750
You don't meet a natural-born
vault dweller every day.
520
00:27:56,750 --> 00:27:58,000
We're a dying breed.
521
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,666
Oh, you're... you're from here?
522
00:28:00,666 --> 00:28:03,500
- Five generations, and proud of it.
- Ah.
523
00:28:03,500 --> 00:28:04,958
I just thought because...
524
00:28:06,875 --> 00:28:11,375
Because so many, uh, people here
seem to be refugees
525
00:28:11,375 --> 00:28:13,750
- from the surface.
- Tell me about it.
526
00:28:13,750 --> 00:28:15,625
Ooh. These people.
527
00:28:15,625 --> 00:28:17,000
Am I right?
528
00:28:19,041 --> 00:28:20,958
I grabbed a moldy one.
529
00:28:20,958 --> 00:28:22,375
- What do you mean by that?
- Well,
530
00:28:22,375 --> 00:28:25,125
you won't find anyone
more open-minded than me,
531
00:28:25,125 --> 00:28:28,791
but they come in here
with their smelly food
532
00:28:28,791 --> 00:28:30,875
and their weird ideas.
533
00:28:32,416 --> 00:28:34,333
You're from a vault. You get it.
534
00:28:34,333 --> 00:28:36,583
I-I don't understand.
If you don't like people from the surface
535
00:28:36,583 --> 00:28:38,000
then why do you keep taking them in?
536
00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:40,375
It's a policy from before my time.
537
00:28:40,375 --> 00:28:42,500
But these newcomers, ooh, let me tell you,
538
00:28:42,500 --> 00:28:45,833
if you want to get elected,
you have to respect their traditions
539
00:28:45,833 --> 00:28:49,583
and tolerate them
and not call them "surfies." It's awful.
540
00:28:50,666 --> 00:28:54,000
What, you don't
take in surface dwellers in your vault?
541
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:57,208
Well, to be honest, no, we don't.
542
00:28:57,208 --> 00:28:59,416
- What is that like?
- No,
543
00:28:59,416 --> 00:29:01,083
I think what you're doing here
is a really good thing.
544
00:29:01,083 --> 00:29:03,541
I saw what was left of Shady Sands.
545
00:29:03,541 --> 00:29:07,291
An entire city just destroyed
in an instant. It...
546
00:29:09,208 --> 00:29:10,875
I mean, some of these people
lost everything.
547
00:29:10,875 --> 00:29:13,458
And that was a tragedy.
548
00:29:13,458 --> 00:29:16,791
So we took our share of them in
and gave them a home
549
00:29:16,791 --> 00:29:18,375
because it's what we do.
550
00:29:18,375 --> 00:29:20,666
But it's like you can't
make a funny joke about it
551
00:29:20,666 --> 00:29:22,000
without offending these guys.
552
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:25,250
I mean, one funny joke I told
on maybe ten occasions.
553
00:29:25,250 --> 00:29:27,583
- What was the joke?
554
00:29:27,583 --> 00:29:28,666
I forget.
555
00:29:28,666 --> 00:29:31,375
All I know is it was a huge bomb.
556
00:29:32,375 --> 00:29:35,041
Pretty good, right?
557
00:29:35,041 --> 00:29:37,541
Oh, she doesn't get it.
558
00:29:37,541 --> 00:29:38,916
Any other questions?
559
00:29:38,916 --> 00:29:41,625
I do have one. Uh...
560
00:29:41,625 --> 00:29:44,791
What's on Level 12
and why can't we go there?
561
00:29:44,791 --> 00:29:46,375
We don't talk about that.
562
00:29:46,375 --> 00:29:48,333
- Geez, what's the matter with you?
- Sorry, I--
563
00:29:48,333 --> 00:29:49,916
- I just--
- You should go now.
564
00:29:49,916 --> 00:29:52,333
- I only wanted to--
- Goodbye, Goosey.
565
00:29:59,250 --> 00:30:01,208
Skedaddle.
566
00:30:47,500 --> 00:30:48,500
Hey.
567
00:30:53,166 --> 00:30:55,125
Where do you guys get your power from?
568
00:31:43,875 --> 00:31:46,208
I see you found our fusion core.
569
00:31:50,666 --> 00:31:53,041
How are we adjusting to life down here?
570
00:31:53,041 --> 00:31:55,083
Does it matter?
571
00:31:55,083 --> 00:31:56,625
I'm leaving soon.
572
00:32:00,541 --> 00:32:01,958
Aren't I?
573
00:32:04,083 --> 00:32:06,541
Some people who come here
have a hard time adjusting
574
00:32:06,541 --> 00:32:08,958
to finally feeling safe.
575
00:32:10,208 --> 00:32:13,750
All the things you've had to do to survive
still fresh in your mind.
576
00:32:17,583 --> 00:32:21,083
Trust doesn't come easily to those of us
with a guilty conscience.
577
00:32:26,333 --> 00:32:27,458
Here.
578
00:32:27,458 --> 00:32:29,458
Unit 428.
579
00:32:29,458 --> 00:32:32,541
How about you sleep in a room
of your own tonight?
580
00:32:32,541 --> 00:32:34,875
Have a hot shower.
581
00:32:34,875 --> 00:32:37,708
Nothing wrong with
a little bit of comfort.
582
00:32:45,583 --> 00:32:49,166
Um, when you say "hot shower,"
what does-what does that mean, exactly?
583
00:33:56,125 --> 00:33:58,625
♪ I don't believe
in fretting and grieving ♪
584
00:33:58,625 --> 00:34:01,541
♪ Why mess around with strife? ♪
585
00:34:01,541 --> 00:34:03,791
♪ I never was cut out ♪
586
00:34:03,791 --> 00:34:05,625
♪ To step and strut out ♪
587
00:34:05,625 --> 00:34:09,041
♪ Give me the simple life ♪
588
00:34:09,166 --> 00:34:13,041
♪ Some find it pleasant
dining on pheasant ♪
589
00:34:13,166 --> 00:34:15,791
♪ Those things roll off my knife ♪
590
00:34:15,791 --> 00:34:19,625
♪ Just serve me tomatoes
and mashed potatoes ♪
591
00:34:20,708 --> 00:34:23,083
♪ Give me the simple life ♪
592
00:34:23,083 --> 00:34:26,583
♪ A cottage small is all I'm after ♪
593
00:34:26,583 --> 00:34:30,166
♪ Not one that's spacious and wide ♪
594
00:34:30,166 --> 00:34:33,750
♪ A house that rings with joy
and laughter ♪
595
00:34:33,750 --> 00:34:37,875
♪ And the ones you love inside ♪
596
00:34:37,875 --> 00:34:41,291
♪ Some like the high road,
I like the low road ♪
597
00:34:41,291 --> 00:34:44,166
♪ Free from the care and strife ♪
598
00:34:44,166 --> 00:34:48,000
♪ Sounds corny and seedy,
but yes indeedy ♪
599
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:50,875
♪ Give me the simple life ♪
600
00:34:57,958 --> 00:35:01,916
♪ I never was cut out
to step and strut out ♪
601
00:35:01,916 --> 00:35:05,500
♪ Give me the simple life ♪
602
00:35:11,666 --> 00:35:16,041
♪ Just serve me tomatoes
and mashed potatoes ♪
603
00:35:16,041 --> 00:35:18,708
♪ Give me the simple life ♪
604
00:35:18,708 --> 00:35:22,458
♪ A cottage small is all I'm after ♪
605
00:35:22,458 --> 00:35:25,333
♪ Not one that's spacious and wide ♪
606
00:35:25,333 --> 00:35:28,791
♪ A house that rings with joy
and laughter...
607
00:35:28,791 --> 00:35:30,333
Excuse me.
608
00:35:30,333 --> 00:35:32,416
Yes.
609
00:35:38,375 --> 00:35:39,875
What is this?
610
00:37:03,250 --> 00:37:04,958
It's almost starting.
611
00:37:23,583 --> 00:37:24,625
Oh, uh, excuse me?
612
00:37:24,625 --> 00:37:26,166
What's going on?
613
00:37:26,166 --> 00:37:27,875
It's a Surface Dweller tradition.
614
00:37:27,875 --> 00:37:30,250
It can get a little rambunctious
for my taste.
615
00:37:33,791 --> 00:37:36,000
You're welcome to come.
616
00:37:37,500 --> 00:37:39,166
Sure.
617
00:38:04,833 --> 00:38:06,541
Well, shit.
618
00:38:07,791 --> 00:38:09,875
Why, Sorrel Booker.
619
00:38:13,041 --> 00:38:17,541
I heard it was a ghoul
that fucked up that Super Duper Mart.
620
00:38:17,541 --> 00:38:19,625
Nobody told me it was the ghoul.
621
00:38:19,625 --> 00:38:21,541
Mm. Mm.
622
00:38:23,208 --> 00:38:24,958
You boys know who you just brought in?
623
00:38:26,166 --> 00:38:27,666
This sumbitch right here
624
00:38:27,666 --> 00:38:31,166
used to be the best bounty hunter
to ever shoot a man in the ass.
625
00:38:31,166 --> 00:38:34,625
Kids these days don't know
their goddamn history.
626
00:38:34,625 --> 00:38:36,583
Say, you got a needle and thread?
627
00:38:36,583 --> 00:38:39,041
Sorry,
628
00:38:39,041 --> 00:38:41,291
we don't do a lot of knitting 'round here.
629
00:38:41,291 --> 00:38:43,750
It's called sewing.
630
00:38:43,750 --> 00:38:45,833
I think I got some in my bag.
631
00:39:05,166 --> 00:39:07,208
Would you mind?
632
00:39:08,833 --> 00:39:12,250
Aw, come on now, Sorrel,
we old friends, ain't we?
633
00:39:20,583 --> 00:39:23,500
Look at you. 200 years.
634
00:39:24,625 --> 00:39:27,291
I don't know what keeps you going.
635
00:39:27,291 --> 00:39:29,750
Maybe you just like the feeling
636
00:39:29,750 --> 00:39:32,458
of that good old California sunshine
637
00:39:32,458 --> 00:39:35,166
on your wrinkly-ass face.
638
00:39:37,250 --> 00:39:40,625
Or maybe you're still looking for her.
639
00:39:43,500 --> 00:39:44,666
Well, Sorrel...
640
00:39:46,375 --> 00:39:49,083
I can confidently cross
one reason off that list for you.
641
00:39:49,083 --> 00:39:51,583
I sure as hell ain't still alive
642
00:39:51,583 --> 00:39:53,875
so that I can have
unintelligent conversations
643
00:39:53,875 --> 00:39:55,875
with dipshits like yourself.
644
00:39:58,333 --> 00:40:00,500
Mind your fucking mouth.
645
00:40:00,500 --> 00:40:03,166
That's the president of the government
you're talking to.
646
00:40:06,708 --> 00:40:08,125
Oh...
647
00:40:09,875 --> 00:40:11,916
You a president now?
648
00:40:11,916 --> 00:40:13,833
Don't see why not.
649
00:40:13,833 --> 00:40:16,541
Well, then you might
want to hire a publicist.
650
00:40:16,541 --> 00:40:19,000
'Cause this is the first
I'm hearing about this outfit.
651
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:22,500
Now, what I am hearing
is a whole lot of chatter
652
00:40:22,500 --> 00:40:24,166
about some woman.
653
00:40:24,166 --> 00:40:25,833
Name of Moldaver.
654
00:40:30,541 --> 00:40:32,333
They call her the Flame Mother.
655
00:40:33,458 --> 00:40:35,083
Now, that bitch is dangerous.
656
00:40:35,083 --> 00:40:37,708
Well, when it comes to leadership
these days,
657
00:40:37,708 --> 00:40:40,625
dangerous is what they call
a prerequisite.
658
00:40:40,625 --> 00:40:43,375
Somebody's got to step up
and bring some order around here.
659
00:40:43,375 --> 00:40:46,125
You know why these boys brought you in?
660
00:40:46,125 --> 00:40:47,541
'Cause I fucked up
661
00:40:47,541 --> 00:40:50,250
a poor, defenseless
gang-affiliated organ dealership?
662
00:40:50,250 --> 00:40:52,000
- Yep.
- Mm.
663
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:54,916
- Now, I've always liked you.
- Well, I've always liked you.
664
00:40:54,916 --> 00:40:58,625
Well, ain't that sweet?
But that Super Duper Mart you gutted
665
00:40:58,625 --> 00:41:00,208
was under our protection.
666
00:41:01,333 --> 00:41:04,958
So, if I wanted to let you go scot-free,
667
00:41:04,958 --> 00:41:07,833
folks might lose faith
about what we're trying to do here.
668
00:41:07,833 --> 00:41:09,083
And then what?
669
00:41:10,500 --> 00:41:12,333
Anarchy in the streets.
670
00:41:12,333 --> 00:41:14,750
Exactly.
671
00:41:14,750 --> 00:41:17,666
Now, you got anything to say
in your defense?
672
00:41:17,666 --> 00:41:19,333
Guilty as charged.
673
00:41:19,333 --> 00:41:20,958
Just like that?
674
00:41:22,291 --> 00:41:25,583
Just like that.
675
00:41:25,583 --> 00:41:27,833
Now, if you need any more evidence,
676
00:41:27,833 --> 00:41:31,541
I can tell you about this town
I just shot up, Filly.
677
00:41:31,541 --> 00:41:35,083
Oh, I must have killed nine or ten people.
678
00:41:35,083 --> 00:41:36,833
My daddy lives in Filly.
679
00:41:36,833 --> 00:41:39,291
Well, not no more he don't,
680
00:41:39,291 --> 00:41:41,000
unless he's a coward.
681
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:43,541
Don't take the bait, son.
682
00:41:43,541 --> 00:41:47,166
Well, I ain't fishing.
I'm just trying to game this out, now.
683
00:41:47,166 --> 00:41:51,166
In my experience, the apple
tends not to fall too far from the tree.
684
00:41:52,916 --> 00:41:55,166
Is that true in your case?
685
00:41:55,166 --> 00:41:57,583
My daddy ain't no coward.
686
00:41:57,583 --> 00:42:01,000
Well, then I guess the only question is...
687
00:42:02,208 --> 00:42:03,833
...are you?
688
00:42:05,541 --> 00:42:06,791
Sheriff Rex.
689
00:42:07,875 --> 00:42:10,000
Take Sheriff Troy's guns away.
690
00:42:13,416 --> 00:42:15,708
Very presidential of you.
691
00:42:17,250 --> 00:42:19,583
Take him out back
and feed him to the hogs.
692
00:42:40,458 --> 00:42:42,041
Goddamn it.
693
00:42:43,291 --> 00:42:45,791
I got one question for you, ol' buddy.
694
00:42:45,791 --> 00:42:48,416
Why...
695
00:42:51,375 --> 00:42:54,375
do you have this picture on your wall?
696
00:42:54,375 --> 00:42:56,583
That's Moldaver.
697
00:42:58,166 --> 00:42:59,916
Why?
698
00:43:01,708 --> 00:43:03,958
Well, that's not
how I remember her, is all.
699
00:43:05,250 --> 00:43:06,750
Yeah?
700
00:43:06,750 --> 00:43:09,708
Well, how do you remember her?
701
00:43:17,333 --> 00:43:21,166
♪ Well, what would you do
if your baby left you alone? ♪
702
00:44:12,416 --> 00:44:14,208
- Hi.
- Hey.
703
00:45:57,791 --> 00:45:58,791
Thanks for coming.
704
00:45:58,791 --> 00:46:00,375
Yeah, we'll see if I stay.
705
00:46:00,375 --> 00:46:01,916
You'll stay.
706
00:46:15,041 --> 00:46:17,083
Flame Mother, we remember.
707
00:46:17,083 --> 00:46:18,166
Flame Mother,
708
00:46:18,166 --> 00:46:20,125
we remember.
709
00:46:20,125 --> 00:46:21,916
We bring back the past
710
00:46:21,916 --> 00:46:23,208
as we remember.
711
00:46:23,208 --> 00:46:25,708
We bring back the past
as we remember.
712
00:46:25,708 --> 00:46:27,875
We bring back Shady Sands...
713
00:46:27,875 --> 00:46:29,958
We bring back Shady Sands.
714
00:46:29,958 --> 00:46:32,125
- ...as we remember.
As we remember.
715
00:46:32,125 --> 00:46:36,083
- We bring back those taken from us.
- We bring back those taken from us.
716
00:46:36,083 --> 00:46:38,375
We bring back those taken from us...
717
00:46:38,375 --> 00:46:40,666
We bring back those taken from us.
718
00:46:40,666 --> 00:46:43,083
...by covering ourselves in their ashes.
719
00:46:43,083 --> 00:46:45,750
By covering ourselves in their ashes.
720
00:46:45,750 --> 00:46:47,541
We bring back those taken from us
721
00:46:47,541 --> 00:46:49,875
by covering ourselves in their ashes.
722
00:46:49,875 --> 00:46:52,333
By covering ourselves
in their ashes.
723
00:46:52,333 --> 00:46:55,000
To bring back Shady Sands,
blood must spill.
724
00:46:55,000 --> 00:46:58,291
To bring back Shady Sands,
blood must spill.
725
00:46:58,291 --> 00:46:59,708
I think there's somebody you should meet.
726
00:46:59,708 --> 00:47:01,375
- Yeah, who's that?
Blood must spill.
727
00:47:01,375 --> 00:47:04,500
- Blood must spill.
- Blood must spill.
728
00:47:04,500 --> 00:47:05,916
Blood must spill.
729
00:47:05,916 --> 00:47:10,000
- Blood must spill.
To bring back Shady Sands,
blood must spill.
730
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:13,250
To bring back Shady Sands,
blood must spill.
731
00:47:13,250 --> 00:47:15,166
- Oh, Flame Mother...
- Oh, Flame Mother...
732
00:47:15,166 --> 00:47:18,291
Oh, Flame Mother,
you will be our salvation.
733
00:47:18,291 --> 00:47:21,625
Oh, Flame Mother, you will be
our salvation.
734
00:47:25,875 --> 00:47:27,291
Mr. Howard?
735
00:47:32,541 --> 00:47:34,541
Oh, Flame Mother,
736
00:47:34,541 --> 00:47:36,875
you will be our salvation.
737
00:47:37,958 --> 00:47:39,083
I'm a big fan.
738
00:48:04,083 --> 00:48:05,291
Titus?!
739
00:48:07,750 --> 00:48:09,291
We need to talk...
740
00:48:10,291 --> 00:48:11,916
Yes.
741
00:48:14,375 --> 00:48:15,791
You were right about this place.
742
00:48:15,791 --> 00:48:16,875
No.
743
00:48:16,875 --> 00:48:20,708
You were right. Check this out.
These are called oysters.
744
00:48:20,708 --> 00:48:23,708
You want one?
They make you feel so good.
745
00:48:23,708 --> 00:48:25,958
You want to make my cock explode now?
746
00:48:25,958 --> 00:48:28,541
- What?
- Sorry, intercourse?
747
00:48:28,541 --> 00:48:30,291
No, Titus.
748
00:48:30,291 --> 00:48:32,916
No, we need to leave. Right now.
749
00:48:32,916 --> 00:48:34,625
These people are insane.
750
00:48:34,625 --> 00:48:37,250
- Yeah, they're like you.
A little weird, but nice.
- No.
751
00:48:37,250 --> 00:48:39,333
Plus, my arm. You know, I really...
752
00:48:39,333 --> 00:48:41,166
I ought to give it a little more time.
753
00:48:44,416 --> 00:48:47,291
Okay. Titus, look,
754
00:48:47,291 --> 00:48:48,916
I get why you'd want to stay.
755
00:48:48,916 --> 00:48:51,291
Okay? I really do, I...
756
00:48:51,291 --> 00:48:54,833
I know this must all seem really nice
compared to the-the shoot show
757
00:48:54,833 --> 00:48:55,916
that's up there.
758
00:48:55,916 --> 00:48:58,541
I wouldn't blame you
if you wanted to go back on our deal
759
00:48:58,541 --> 00:49:02,041
and-and just be somewhere
that is good and safe.
760
00:49:03,625 --> 00:49:05,041
But this isn't it.
761
00:49:05,041 --> 00:49:06,958
They gave me a robe.
762
00:49:06,958 --> 00:49:08,000
I know.
763
00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:10,000
And slippers.
764
00:49:11,500 --> 00:49:13,583
These people are hiding something from us
765
00:49:13,583 --> 00:49:15,666
and I'm gonna prove it to you, okay?
766
00:49:15,666 --> 00:49:16,833
I'm not leaving without you.
767
00:49:19,458 --> 00:49:22,000
♪ Say then we'll be married ♪
768
00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:25,625
♪ In the month of May ♪
769
00:53:19,791 --> 00:53:22,458
Glad you' re all right.
770
00:53:24,708 --> 00:53:28,041
When I saw the door was open, I worried
one of you might have gotten out.
771
00:53:42,291 --> 00:53:43,500
Hello?
772
00:54:10,375 --> 00:54:12,916
Aah!
773
00:54:28,791 --> 00:54:31,541
No! You're crazy!
774
00:54:31,541 --> 00:54:35,833
You people are crazy!
Your entire culture is insane!
775
00:54:35,833 --> 00:54:37,083
I'm sure if we came to your home
776
00:54:37,083 --> 00:54:38,583
- we would say the same thing.
Get off!
777
00:54:40,833 --> 00:54:42,833
No!
778
00:55:01,291 --> 00:55:03,500
{\an8}♪ I'm tickled pink ♪
779
00:55:03,500 --> 00:55:06,666
{\an8}♪ That things are rosy ♪
780
00:55:06,666 --> 00:55:11,500
{\an8}♪ And skies are blue once again ♪
781
00:55:11,500 --> 00:55:17,125
{\an8}♪ Let the bygones go bye-bye ♪
782
00:55:17,125 --> 00:55:22,291
{\an8}♪ No more will I sigh or cry ♪
783
00:55:23,958 --> 00:55:26,041
{\an8}♪ I'm tickled pink ♪
784
00:55:26,041 --> 00:55:29,458
{\an8}♪ The moon is yellow ♪
785
00:55:29,458 --> 00:55:33,083
{\an8}♪ And I'm your fellow tonight ♪
786
00:55:34,458 --> 00:55:39,458
{\an8}♪ Soon we'll greet that red-letter day ♪
787
00:55:39,458 --> 00:55:42,208
{\an8}♪ When I will pop the question ♪
788
00:55:42,208 --> 00:55:45,125
{\an8}♪ And you'll say, "Okay" ♪
789
00:55:45,125 --> 00:55:50,750
{\an8}♪ Say then we'll be married
in the month of May ♪
790
00:55:52,458 --> 00:55:54,583
{\an8}♪ I'm tickled pink ♪
791
00:55:54,583 --> 00:55:58,041
{\an8}♪ That things are rosy ♪
792
00:55:58,041 --> 00:56:02,750
{\an8}♪ And skies are blue once again ♪
793
00:56:02,750 --> 00:56:08,333
{\an8}♪ Let the bygones go bye-bye ♪
794
00:56:08,333 --> 00:56:13,458
{\an8}♪ No more will I sigh or cry ♪
795
00:56:15,250 --> 00:56:17,416
{\an8}♪ I'm tickled pink ♪
796
00:56:17,416 --> 00:56:20,916
{\an8}♪ The moon is yellow ♪
797
00:56:20,916 --> 00:56:25,791
{\an8}♪ And I'm your fellow tonight ♪
798
00:56:25,791 --> 00:56:31,083
{\an8}♪ Soon we'll greet that red-letter day ♪
799
00:56:31,083 --> 00:56:33,833
{\an8}♪ When I will pop the question ♪
800
00:56:33,833 --> 00:56:36,875
{\an8}♪ And you say, "Okay" ♪
801
00:56:36,875 --> 00:56:43,291
{\an8}♪ Say then we'll be married
in the month of May ♪