WEBVTT
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KEEP OUT
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EPISODE 4
KICKING TURBO GRANNY'S ASS
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Okarun, you first.
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I believe it's ladies first, actually.
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But see, I'm so teary-eyed.
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They're bone dry.
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It's only fair to go side-by-side!
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Hey! Okarun, you're behind me!
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Argh, that's not fair, Miss Ayase!
Now you're behind me!
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- Damn you!
- Wait! Hold on, stop it!
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- Let's go.
- Okay.
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So what were we going to do again
when Turbo Granny shows up? Punch her?
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No! We're luring her outside of Shono City
to separate her from the location-bound spirit!
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That way, she'll weaken,
and even we can defeat her.
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That's right, that's right.
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But we defeated that giant alien already,
so maybe we can defeat her, too?
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You were scared just now.
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I mean, she's a granny!
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After experiencing something
that huge, a granny...
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So huge!
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Wh-What should we do, Miss Ayase!?
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Calm down!
You just mentioned it just now!
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We're leaving Shono City, right?
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Let's go!
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What!?
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No way! Is this legit?
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She's coming this way!
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I'm borrowing this!
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I should be able to do it. Go!
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Her eyes are mouth! So gross!
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Miss Ayase, please unleash the curse!
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I'll make something out of this!
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- Got it! Counting on you!
- Okay! I'll do my best!
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Man, no good. I don't think I can do it.
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I am utterly useless...
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Oh, that's right,
you become a total downer.
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I'll cheer for you, so go do your best!
Fight on!
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I'll be crushed to death
from that pressure...
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No way!
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Miss Ayase? What's going on?
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Why? I can't see it!
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The power of the curse is gone?
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I returned his weenie to him.
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The curse is no longer.
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What a surprise!
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I didn't expect you to use
the power of the curse to transform!
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But I won't let you do it.
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You thieving pig!
I won't let you use my power!
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I'm going to thoroughly chew
and eat you up!
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Taunt her.
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That thing has absolute confidence
in its running.
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A few random taunts
and it's sure to take the challenge.
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Are you that scared of losing
in a race?
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Such brute force is so unfashionable.
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I mean, your name is Turbo Granny, right?
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There's no way you'd pass a race
to show off how fast you can run.
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If you're really Turbo...
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then challenge us with how fast you can run!
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You...
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Who do you think
you're mouthing off to, huh?
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There's no way I'd lose in a running match.
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Fine. I'll accept your challenge.
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Besides, I can eat you two at any point.
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What are the rules?
Where's the finish line?
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No finish line. We're playing tag.
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If you catch us, you win.
Simple, yeah?
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Count for ten minutes when you begin.
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We'll make a run for it
in the meantime.
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Those are the rules, so you absolutely
have to adhere to them.
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If you don't, the legend of Turbo Granny
will just be a piece of crap.
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Very well.
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I hate people who break the rules.
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Then, let's begin! Run, Okarun!
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One, two, three, four...
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Amazing! I totally thought
we were goners!
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Miss Ayase, are you a genius?
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I know! But I shoulda provoked a bit harder!
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One minute, three minutes,
five minutes...
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Ten minutes might be cutting it close!
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Eight minutes, six minutes...
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Hold on! She's counting weird!
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Ten minutes.
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Okaru...
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Miss Ayase!
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Miss Ayase!
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Her ten minutes have passed.
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Now I have to count your ten minutes.
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Forty...
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One minute... Two minutes...
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That's cheating!
Release Miss Ayase at once!
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Fifty-six... Fifty-seven...
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Stop! That way of counting is absurd!
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You said you were going
to adhere to the rules!
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She didn't specify how to count.
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Four minutes... Five minutes...
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Gimme a break! Stop counting!
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Ten minutes.
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There.
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Caught you.
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But you're kinda dense, Okarun.
I'll probably be helping you next time, too!
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Let me suckle that teat!
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Ouch!
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How dare you suckle my teat
without permission!?
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Let go, you bastard! Brat!
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You're the one who said it!
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I absolutely won't let go
until you release Miss Ayase!
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Ouch!
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What the hell's going on?
I can't muster my strength!
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Is it because of this outfit!?
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Damn you! I have no choice!
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I'll possess you!
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What a hassle!
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Damn brat!
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You aren't connected
to some sorcerer, are you?
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Oh well. I'll eat the girl and end it all.
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What is this feeling
of being crushed inside a hand?
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I can tell. Even if I can't see,
I can tell really well.
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Granny's main form slipped in,
so it's crystal clear...
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by sense of touch!
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Blast you!
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Let go!
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You saved me, Miss Ayase!
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That's my line.
That was awesome, Okarun!
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Damn it! Let me outta this brat!
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I caught you, you scummy hag!
How should we torture you now...
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Give her back.
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Give Granny back!
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Location-bound spirit, kill them!
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Crab!
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Why is the location-bound spirit a crab!?
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Grandma said the dead turn themselves
into freshwater crabs to cross the River Styx!
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BEWARE OF BEARS
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This way! Over here!
Where are you looking, you fool?
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Okarun, time to transform!
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Damn granny! You stay still, you punk!
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- How dare you address me as such?
- Miss Ayase, hurry!
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It's really hard! Unlike before,
you have the real thing in there!
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Here it comes!
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That was close! This is super serious!
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Curse you! Don't use my power
without permission!
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Let go, you punks!
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This is great!
It's easier to squish you directly!
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Momo-chan, it's lookin' bad.
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Hey! Don't get chummy
and call me by my first name!
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You're too heavy
so I can't make this curve.
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For real!?
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Damn it!
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Time to go full throttle now!
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Wicked! It's like a helicopter!
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I can't do it anymore.
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Ouch!
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Okarun, are you okay?
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I'm all droopy...
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Sorry. Seriously, you're a lifesaver!
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But I already used one full throttle.
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That's right, you can only go
full throttle twice, right?
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But I think we gained some distance, didn't we?
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It's here!
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There's a ton of faces on its back!
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Crap! There's a lot of people here, too!
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What's that?
He's totally giving a piggyback ride.
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What dedication. So hilarious!
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This is totally embarrassing!
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No way! Nobody else can see the crab!?
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Hold on a second!
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That means we just look like
we're all in on a chicken fight!
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I hope I don't bump into any friends!
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Momo-chan, my stamina
is getting seriously low.
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Come on, try harder!
What about your other full throttle?
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No good even if I go full throttle.
I can't leave Shono City distance-wise!
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At this rate, that thing
will catch up and eat us!
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Seriously, anything but that!
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I ain't letting no crab eat me!
I would rather eat a crab instead!
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Let's try something. Hang a right, Okarun!
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HEALTH LAND
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Welcome. How many will it be?
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Two!
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MANGA CAFE
A TIME TO RELAX
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Head upstairs!
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It should be harder for it
to chase us in a narrow place!
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It doesn't matter at all!?
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An explosion!
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Run away!
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Hot! What is this place?
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This is not good, Miss Ayase!
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Crabs thrive in waterfronts!
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Water is water, but...
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this is a hot spring!
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When you boil crabs, the meat
tightens up and gets plump, right?
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Tightening up means that
the muscle fibers stiffen up,
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so maybe its movements will slow down.
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It stopped. It stopped!
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Boiled!
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Now that it's all red,
it totally looks yummy!
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Freaky! You were looking at it like that?
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Stop eyeing it,
and let's just get out of here!
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Straight down this road
and we'll escape Shono City.
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Wait, aren't there fewer people than before?
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Indeed.
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What's that?
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Crap, crap, crap, crap!
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What are those guys!?
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Idiots! You won't get away that easily!
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There's a giant cemetery
at the edge of Shono City!
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I just borrowed some help
from the spirits already resting there.
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After all, Shono City is our territory!
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Miss Ayase!
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We're not letting you leave Shono City!
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Okarun, go full throttle.
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Huh? Is it all right?
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Even if I use it here,
we won't make it to the next city!
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If you don't use it, we'll die right here!
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Trust me!
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Man, I'm so depressed.
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You're done for.
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One more full throttle from this kid
and he'll be immobile!
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Do it!
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Momo-chan, I can't make this turn!
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Don't stop!
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Momo-chan! We gotta get back
to the original route!
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You untransformed!
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Huh?
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Don't suddenly let go of me!
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Okarun, land!
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I'm done for. I'm at my limit!
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My body is going to rip apart!
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Too wicked! I thought
I was gonna puke out my organs!
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Okarun, stand up!
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It's only a little further!
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Turbo Granny.
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Crap, I let go of her!
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I can't forgive you for this.
You keep cheating.
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What I detest the most...
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is your lack of respect for elders.
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You really are an amazing senior.
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I've never seen an old person
who can bully young folks this much.
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Mad respect for that.
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Speak properly, you punk.
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I can see through your ploys
to use modern words to fool the elderly.
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I really hate those words. I hate it.
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I hate shady brats like that.
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What a...
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son of a bitch.
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All right, I'll eat ya, so run away.
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You can leave Shono City real soon now.
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I'll wait for you to finish running.
Ten minutes? Or 20 minutes?
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Then I'll take one second.
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My ability is to take anything...
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and grab it.
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Get back here!
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Turbo Granny used to be called
Hundred Kilo Granny!
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The Takasaki Line's maximum speed
is 120 kmph!
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She can't catch up to us!
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You're so slow! What a slowpoke!
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You're nothing compared to us!
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You're dead meat!
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You fool!
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Trains aren't always going at full speed!
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They slow down at curves!
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But I can always run at 100 kmph.
I'm not letting you get away!
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"I'm not letting you get away,"
is my line, moron.
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Just like Grandma said,
you always take the bait if I taunt ya.
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You're already on board...
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the rails of your defeat.
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Yeah. Welcome to Kamigoe City.
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You rotten bastard pigs!
17:30.670 --> 17:31.920
Let go of me!
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You were really fast, senior.
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It's like you haven't lived
a long time for nothing.
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Nobody can win against you.
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But in this race...
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I win.
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Ow.
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Miss Ayase, where are we!?
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Where's the crab? And Turbo Granny?
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Looks like we defeated them.
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I really didn't want to be rough like this.
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This is where girls around your age were violated,
cut to pieces, and tossed away.
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They didn't become evil spirits
because they wanted to.
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We spirit mediums
have long hunted Turbo Granny.
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Granny always showed up in places
where spirits of girls met irrational deaths.
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Perhaps she went around consoling the spirits
of the girls who couldn't rest in peace.
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But the dead shouldn't assault the living.
That's no good.
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We have to use force
to send them to the other side.
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The same goes for the living.
They should never do anything to mock the dead.
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Trample into their territory disrespectfully,
and you can only blame yourself for your death.
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Those are the rules for the living
and the dead to coexist.
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I'm glad you were okay.
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Damn it, old hag!
Don't take all the big ones!
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If you don't give me this piece of crab,
I'll break your Bakatono DVDs!
19:53.230 --> 19:57.020
Try me! You do that and I'll burn
all your Ken Takakura merch!
19:57.020 --> 19:59.690
You're taking Mr. Ken as hostage!?
You really aren't human!
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You're the one
who took Bakatono hostage first!
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- What'd you say, hag!?
- Huh?
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Um, I don't have an appetite,
so if you'd like...
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You have crab right in front of you
but no appetite? What a loser.
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Monster.
20:10.330 --> 20:12.120
I'd totally be eating
under normal circumstances!
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How can you eat crab right after
experiencing what happened?
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Then what do you want to eat
at what kind of time, you entitled brat?
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I don't want to talk anymore!
20:21.050 --> 20:25.050
You're so whiny for a guy.
Are you sure you have something down there?
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I do! Thank you for retrieving it for me!
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Show me.
20:29.600 --> 20:30.140
Huh?
20:30.140 --> 20:32.430
I'm telling you to show me
that it's actually there.
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Um...
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Are you stupid?
20:41.490 --> 20:43.400
Are you insane!?
20:43.400 --> 20:44.860
Miss Ayase, do something about this!
20:47.070 --> 20:49.790
This family is insane!
20:50.240 --> 20:51.700
Hold up, you!
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Thank you for everything.
20:57.670 --> 20:59.630
It's late so be careful.
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I think it'll be safer than this house.
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You're not getting away next time.
21:04.180 --> 21:05.760
I'm never showing you.
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So chilly.
21:10.430 --> 21:14.440
Leave her be. She's not serious about it.
21:14.560 --> 21:18.900
You weren't eating crab and were pretty depressed,
so I think she tried to cheer you up?
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So that's it. I'm sorry I made her
be so considerate...
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Not!
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Well then, goodbye.
21:27.490 --> 21:28.950
Yeah. Bye-bye.
21:32.540 --> 21:33.950
Goodbye?
21:34.750 --> 21:36.170
Goodbye...
21:36.750 --> 21:38.710
Goodbye?
21:38.790 --> 21:40.340
Goodbye...
21:40.460 --> 21:42.250
Goodbye?
21:42.550 --> 21:44.550
Goodbye...
21:45.260 --> 21:47.180
Goodbye?
21:47.840 --> 21:49.550
Goodbye...
21:49.890 --> 21:51.810
Goodbye?
21:55.520 --> 21:56.850
Okarun!
22:01.570 --> 22:03.030
See you tomorrow!
22:09.620 --> 22:10.570
Okay!
23:42.630 --> 23:44.540
Grandma, why was it a crab?
23:44.540 --> 23:48.670
They say spirits of the dead turn themselves
into freshwater crabs to cross the River Styx!
23:48.670 --> 23:50.800
That's why they turned into location-bound
spirits inside that tunnel.
23:50.800 --> 23:52.640
But yeah, I'm surprised
you really ate all that crab!
23:52.640 --> 23:54.640
EPISODE 5
LIKE, WHERE ARE YOU BALLS?
23:52.890 --> 23:54.640
Next episode,
"Like, Where Are Your Balls!?"
23:54.800 --> 23:56.720
That's why I told you to show me.