WEBVTT
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Ahhh!
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Please stop!
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"Nice Shower Best Friend Killer:
Amicide Who Had an 'Accident'"
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Screw this game! I'm never playing again!
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I didn't pee myself in real life...
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"Kiwame Quest"
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I didn't pee myself in real life...
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"Kiwame Quest"
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It's the same thing all over again!
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"The Only One to Beat the Game"
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The district track meet was held
soon after I entered high school.
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So that's Hiroshi Yuki.
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He was quite fast in middle school.
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I heard he's the track team's ace runner.
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Do your best, Brother.
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I will. I've got this!
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Your brother's so cool!
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Yeah, he is.
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I better not embarrass myself.
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Hiro.
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Hey.
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It's almost time.
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Yep.
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Well? Do you feel nervous?
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Don't be ridiculous!
It's just the district meet.
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Don't get complacent.
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Looks like Moriguchi is competing, too.
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Moriguchi? Oh, Tatsuya Moriguchi.
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He always ranked high in middle school.
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I seem to remember he beat you once.
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Not to mention there
are scouts here today.
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Scouts?
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At a low-level meet like this?
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It's the first high school track meet.
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An assortment of high schools and
Inter High organizations are watching.
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It's definitely an important event.
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Well, I suppose you have a point.
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Later.
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Yeah.
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Moriguchi...
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Calm your nerves. Relax.
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Better use the bathroom now.
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Huh?
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Where is it?
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Hey.
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Are you Hiroshi Yuki?
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Yes, I am.
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Might I have a moment of your time?
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A-Aren't you the famous
runner Mike McLachlan?!
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Yes, though I'm retired
from competition now.
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Olympic silver medalist and
Japanophile Mike McLachlan...
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I'd heard he'd become
a sports writer, but...
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For real? This is crazy!
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Hiroshi Yuki, middle-school track ace.
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I hear you beat district records
in short-distance running.
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Y-You know all that?
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Many promising athletes, such as you and
Tatsuya Moriguchi, are at this track meet.
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I suspect a star of the
track world will be born here.
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Hiroshi, show me your best out there!
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I have high hopes for you!
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I-I'll run my best out there!
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"Seishin High School"
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"Seishin High School"
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I accidentally talked like him.
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"Seishin High School"
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And I forgot to use the bathroom...
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Competitors for the
Boys' 100-Meter Dash, go to your lanes.
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Whoa, it's Tatsuya Moriguchi!
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And there's Hiroshi Yuki! Incredible!
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"Kyushin High School" "Seishin High School"
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"Kyushin High School" "Seishin High School"
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You seem relaxed, Yuki.
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You may not know, but
Olympic medalist McLachlan is here.
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I know.
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Hmph. You know and that's your attitude.
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I just need to run like I always do.
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Running a good time here will
catch his eye and result in an article.
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I'm absolutely determined to win.
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I'm determined, too.
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On your marks!
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Everyone is watching.
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There are even scouts.
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Bring it!
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I'll beat you and stun
everyone with my time!
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Get set!
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Yuki! Break six seconds!
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Don't be ridiculous!
That'd beat the world record!
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Wh-What am I doing?
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Shit! Reach deep!
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Shit! Shit! Shit!
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I can do this!
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Yuki tripped!
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For real?
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Hiro!
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Are you okay?
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I-I'm o--
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No way!
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He wet himself?
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Oh my!
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He was running down the track.
Now it's running down his leg!
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Hiro...
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Wh-Why don't you head to the bathroom?
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I just wanna die.
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U-Um, hey, don't let it get to you.
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Everyone messes up.
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Leave me alone.
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What I mean is, it'll be okay.
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It's not a big deal. You can
just do your best next time.
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Shut up.
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There won't be a next time!
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Mr. McLachlan?
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That was awful.
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W-Wait!
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Hear me out.
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That wasn't my best.
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Normally I can perform--
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You don't know a thing, do you?
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Did you pee on purpose?
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Of course not!
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So then your nerves got to you?
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It would have been better
if it had been intentional.
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What?
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How so?
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A runner's mental strength is key.
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Being unable to perform
under pressure is a fatal flaw.
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But your problem is even
worse than that, Hiroshi.
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Wh-What do you mean?
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You can't figure it out?
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I'll leave you with this Japanese
saying I learned recently:
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Look inward and have a change of pants.
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There's no such saying, dammit!
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What is it?
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You were shouting last night.
Was it the full-dive RPG again?
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I wasn't playing it late at night.
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It's still a bunch of noise. I can't
concentrate on schoolwork.
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Like you don't make a bunch
of noise with your friends.
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Wh-What's your problem?!
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Kaede, Hiroshi. Both of you calm down.
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But he screams in the middle
of the night! Like a werewolf!
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That's some way to talk
about your older brother.
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I'd prefer a werewolf!
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Howling would be way less disturbing
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compared to your "Eek!" and "Eep!"
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Y-You don't have to worry anymore.
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I quit that game.
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Come again? What do you mean, you quit?
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It's an unbelievably shitty game.
I'm selling it.
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A blatant excuse.
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You just don't think you can beat it.
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That's not--
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Lame.
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Pathetic.
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Excuse me?
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What gives? You wanted me to quit!
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This is a completely different issue!
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You threw in the towel on running
and took up full-dive RPGs,
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and to top it off you even abandon that!
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You're just pathetic!
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You called me pathetic again!
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I'm going to school.
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Be careful of cars!
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Dammit! What's her problem?!
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She wants you to keep being
her cool big brother, Hiroshi.
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That's the reason?
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She was bragging to her
classmates about you, after all.
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And when was that?
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Oh, Hiro!
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Listen, we have a little
favor to ask. What do ya say?
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Satisfied?
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Eh?
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Huh? What?
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We didn't ask yet.
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Hiro, are you sure? They--
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It's fine. Drop it.
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Hey, Yuki!
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About your post-graduation plans.
Do you have--
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Working on it. I need a little more time.
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Like, how many more days?
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Yes.
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Hiro? What gives? This is the
seventh time I've called today!
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Sorry. I was at school.
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Can you come to the shop?
I have something to show you.
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Fine. I was actually
planning to drop by anyway.
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"Games"
"Game Shop Kisaragi"
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Stay as long as you like.
I already closed for the day.
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So the thing I want to show you is--
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First things first.
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Here.
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Yes, KQ.
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I want to sell it.
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You and your jokes.
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It's not a joke.
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You're such a kidder!
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I'm serious.
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Really? Could you tell me the reason?
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The reason? Don't you know the reason?!
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I mean, it was just getting good, so...
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"Getting good"?
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What the hell are you talking about?!
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I was made a criminal,
and then I got haunted,
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and to top it all off,
I had an a-a-accident!
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None of that was good!
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I'm sorry.
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"Amicide Who Had an 'Accident'," was it?
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That title was a first for me.
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It was a first for me, too!
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Don't get so upset.
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I mean, the inquisitor girl
was really happy.
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What good does it do me to
raise my approval rating with her?!
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Maybe she'll join your party?
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Yeah, no thanks!
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Enough.
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I'll go somewhere else.
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I wouldn't do that.
Not if you want any money for it.
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Huh? What do you mean?
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Don't you know?
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When you try to sell a bike
with 200,000 kilometers on it,
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you end up paying them
to take it off your hands.
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Then why did you sell it at full price?
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I'm sorry. I can't get into that just yet.
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But,
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have you heard of Soichiro Kamui?
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Never heard of him.
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He's a young member of the
Tokyo Metropolitan Assembly.
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He was a very skilled
full-dive RPG player.
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It's embarrassing to admit, but in high
school I was wild about full-dive RPGs.
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A particular game made a
tremendous impact on my life.
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Now that's surprising.
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What kind of game was it?
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It was a hard-core full-dive RPG
that pursued ultimate realism.
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Soichiro Kamui.
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His KQ username is Kamui.
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You mean...
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His name was Kamui.
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His title was "The Eternally Invincible:
The Never-Bested Adventurer."
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...the guy who supposedly beat KQ?
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Yes. Kamui is the only one
to beat this crap--I mean KQ.
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What did you just say?
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He's the only person publicly
acknowledged to have beaten KQ.
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Not that! Didn't you
call it a crappy game?
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Anyway, I would've preferred
for you clear it on your own,
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but this is better than you
totally losing interest.
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Clean out your eyes and look.
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You clean out ears, not eyes...
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"Auberdine Walkthrough"?
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Kamui made this walkthrough
site for KQ in high school.
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Ahuh...
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I see you're brimming with curiosity!
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You do? How?
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You wanna know what it says now, right?
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Yeah, you do! So go ahead!
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Click! Where it says, "Enter"!
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Okay.
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"To start"
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Wait, even with this walkthrough,
nobody else beat the game?
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Wait, even with this walkthrough,
nobody else beat the game?
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Nope. Because the vast majority
of users couldn't read through it.
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Like the writing was
too dense and difficult?
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A text site, huh...
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In this day and age?
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Hey, trash!
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Huh?
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Hey, trash!
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Trash players who need
a guide to win should just die.
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You know what, die. Die right now.
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See?
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Tough to confront, right?
16:36.490 --> 16:39.320
You meant they couldn't
handle it emotionally?!
16:39.320 --> 16:43.160
Kamui was an insufferable
shithead back then.
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Well, just grit your teeth and bear it.
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I don't wanna read it that badly...
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Wait! You want this info for free?
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Pay up, asshole!
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What? You can't?
16:57.380 --> 16:59.090
You broke bitch.
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Don't take me for granted.
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Bow down and listen gratefully, you worm!
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This is infuriating!
17:08.270 --> 17:12.730
I have brains and brawn,
while you turds are garbage.
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First train your flabby body.
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Three sets of 500 push-ups
and sit-ups a day.
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Run five kilometers. And buy dumbbells.
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Go to the gym.
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Fat chance!
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Yeah, the game reflects real-life ability,
but this crap isn't walkthrough info!
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Okay, trash. What describes you now?
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"I wanna defeat a goblin"
"I wanna date my childhood friend"
"My childhood friend is trying to kill me"
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Okay, trash. What describes you now?
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Okay, trash. What describes you now?
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"My childhood friend
is trying to kill me"!
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Th-That's it!
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Hey, psycho bastard.
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Nobody's childhood friend
would want to kill them.
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Which means you're human trash.
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How did your life get here?
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This hurts!
17:52.360 --> 17:56.230
Listen up. Upon becoming
Hell's Fruit Slicer,
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the childhood friend's stats
increase more than 10-fold.
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If you don't have martial arts
experience like me, you're toast.
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Just let her kill you.
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What the hell?!
Where's the actual walkthrough?
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So I'd like to say. But there is a trick.
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Fighting won't work. So figure
out how to win without fighting.
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Put simply,
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if you were some dude's childhood friend,
what would throw you off the most?
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That's all you get, worm.
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Well? Did it help?
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No, not one bit.
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Oh, he covers this, too.
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"The ghost of my best friend
has my dumb ass at my wits end."
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Th-This is it! But I'm no dumbass!
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Don't freak out over a simple ghost, wuss!
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I mean, you're the one that
killed the guy. That's what you get.
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Take him with you.
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That's all. Die.
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That's no help at all!
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What about this?
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"I'm in the beginning and have no weapons"
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What about this?
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"I'm in the beginning and have no weapons"
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"Weapons"... Yes, please!
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"Weapons"... Yes, please!
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What are you doing?
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Trying to fight bare-handed or something?
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You think you're a karate master?
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There was a sword in the
corner of your room, baldy!
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I'm not bald, dude!
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Wait, there was?
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I rushed out so I never noticed...
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Get some items, too!
19:27.660 --> 19:31.710
I bet your dumb ass thinks
you can buy them any time.
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But items can sell out!
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Buy some ASAP. Got that, dumbass?
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For real. Die, dumbass.
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Oh, shut up already!
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And how does the item shop sell out?
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Hey.
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Uh, um...
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Isn't this great, Hiro?
19:50.180 --> 19:53.640
Now you can advance in KQ.
19:53.640 --> 19:56.900
I-I haven't decided to play...
19:56.900 --> 20:01.860
You know what? If someone
besides Kamui clears the game...
20:01.860 --> 20:04.660
I'd like to marry them.
20:04.660 --> 20:06.370
What?
20:06.370 --> 20:07.990
I'd like to.
20:07.990 --> 20:10.080
No, no. I will.
20:10.080 --> 20:14.500
In other words, I'd also
date them as a precursor.
20:14.500 --> 20:20.420
Hiro, I might just like you quite a bit.
20:20.420 --> 20:21.800
L-Like me?
20:21.800 --> 20:24.340
No, no. Hold up. This is...
20:24.340 --> 20:27.590
I-I won't be fooled!
20:27.590 --> 20:29.100
Oh, I see.
20:29.100 --> 20:32.890
You don't want to do it with me...
20:36.100 --> 20:40.230
W-Well, when you put it that way...
20:40.230 --> 20:43.490
You'll do it... with me?
20:43.490 --> 20:45.900
Y-Yes!
20:45.900 --> 20:50.740
Then you'll need to go home and log in.
20:56.290 --> 21:00.040
And of course I have
to continue from here.
21:00.040 --> 21:04.170
Come on! Tesla, Captain
of the City Guard is waiting!
21:04.170 --> 21:05.300
Come with me!
21:05.300 --> 21:07.760
But keep your distance.
21:09.260 --> 21:11.310
Hiro...
21:11.310 --> 21:13.770
I-If you like,
21:13.770 --> 21:16.980
we could resume the limb severing later.
21:16.980 --> 21:19.440
Absolutely not!
21:19.440 --> 21:22.860
Then let me at least have these sheets.
21:22.860 --> 21:24.360
For what?
21:24.360 --> 21:30.070
I'll carry them with me so I can feel
my wonderful bedwetter at any time.
21:30.070 --> 21:32.580
Please stop saying that.
21:32.580 --> 21:35.790
Now, now. Let's just keep moving.
21:35.790 --> 21:37.080
B-But...
21:37.080 --> 21:38.620
Let's just go.
21:38.620 --> 21:41.130
A lot of time was wasted persuading you.
21:41.130 --> 21:42.290
What? "Wasted"?
21:42.290 --> 21:44.050
Quit dawdling!
21:44.050 --> 21:45.710
All right! I heard you!
21:45.710 --> 21:47.840
Hurry it up!
21:51.300 --> 21:55.180
I'll see you again,
my wonderful bedwetter!
21:55.180 --> 21:57.730
Stop calling me that!
22:03.190 --> 22:05.860
I'm playing this stupid game again.
22:05.860 --> 22:12.030
I may well be a dumbass who
should just die, just like Kamui says.
23:45.880 --> 23:49.380
Episode 5: The Tribulation of a Killer.